


Hollow Heart

by XxMoonSisterxX



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt, F/M, Heartbreak, Pain, Sad Solas, Sadness, Spurned Lavellan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-05
Updated: 2019-02-05
Packaged: 2019-10-22 14:25:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,832
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17664359
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/XxMoonSisterxX/pseuds/XxMoonSisterxX
Summary: Mirabelle continues to search for answers to Solas' unexplained disappearance after the defeat of Corypheus 2 years ago. She was angry at him when he told her that he was sorry for distracting her from her duties as Inquisitor and breaking it off with her so suddenly after removing her vallaslin from her face and saying the words "You are free..."...but now she would stop at nothing to get answers for his leaving the Inquisition...even if it broke her even more.





	Hollow Heart

**Author's Note:**

> This is a lyric one-shot. I am using the song "Hollow" by Breaking Benjamin. I heard it and read the lyrics and thought it would be a perfect Lavellan/Solas lyric one-shot song to use. The band gets all the credit for the song and the singer, Benjamin Burnley, gets all the credits for the lyrics since he writes all the bands songs basically. Also if you are not familiar with Breaking Benjamin and are a rocker/metalhead like me...you should really check them out! They are a Post-Hardcore band from Pennsylvania here in the States. I hope you enjoy this! If it isn't very good I apologize...I'm just getting back into writing again. ^^;  
> \-------------------------------------------------  
> Universe/Fandom: Dragon Age: Inquisition  
> Song/Lyrics Used: "Hollow" by Breaking Benjamin  
> Author's Note: I recommend listening to the song while reading it...it really heightens the mood I am going for with this one-shot: sad and heart breaking.  
> Rating: PG-13   
> Warnings: Minor language, angst, sadness, heartbreak, etc.  
> Pairing: Solas/Mirabelle (My own Lavellan Lightning Mage Inquisitor OC)  
> Location: Skyhold, Mirabelle's private quarters, the Fade/Mirabelle's and Solas' dreams, etc.

Corypheus was defeated but...Mirabelle's heart still ached and mourned the disappearance of Solas after he had held the broken pieces of the Orb Corypheus carried in his hands with a look of sadness and defeat written all over his face. Still...she searched for Solas...for any sign of him anywhere. Leliana's spies always came back empty handed with nothing new on Solas' whereabouts though. Mirabelle began to give up hope. She just...didn't have any feeling of hope sparked anywhere in her mind or heart these days. All Mirabelle had left of her lover was her dreams of the Fade she had every night...

 

_Stay alive..._

_Heaven holds a place for us tonight..._

_I am paralyzed..._

 

She always looked forward to sleeping...because it was the only way she could see Solas again. And she felt like she would get some clues to his whereabouts in her dreams...but she always ended up being disappointed and left without a clue as to where he would be. She needed to find him. She was angry at him for breaking up with her so suddenly after he removed her vallaslin from her face...but now...she knew she still loved and cared for him. She hoped and prayed to every god in existence for some kind of guidance to his location...but they never answered her prayers...not even the Maker himself. Now she truly believed she was abandoned by the gods...everything she did her entire time with the Inquisition didn't even seem to matter to anyone but her close friends she had made during her time there. She retired to her quarters for the night...and looked forward to dreaming. She laid down onto her bed after she had changed into her night clothes and closed her eyes...hoping she would see Solas again in her dreams...

 

_Close your eyes..._

_Drive away the cloud that hides the light..._

_And leave the pain behind_

_Dead alive..._

_Find a way to bury all the lies..._

_Escape the pain inside_

_'Cause I don't want to fall or let you go..._

 

She was inside of her dream world once more. She was dressed normal clothes. She wore a bell sleeved white shirt that had a corset decal at the collar bone area, she wore tight, cotton, black pants, knee-high black flat boots, and had no weapons on her at all. She looked around frantically and searched for Solas in the distance or better yet...right next to her or in front of her. She ran and searched for him. She was in a thick patch of woods once more, and she called out into the darkness,

"Solas?? Solas! Are you here??"

She searched high and low...no trace of him anywhere. She kept running and searched for him further. She called out once more, hoping for an answer or at least a sighting of him,

"Please...answer me! Say anything, dammit! I need to see you!"

Little did she know...a large, lone, black wolf with multiple glowing red eyes was watching her every step of the way. He watched her with sadness in his eyes...and his ears were lowered because of the pain he felt seeing her but not being able to be with her in the real world anymore...

 

_Love left me hollow..._

_I'm with you in the end_

_Cold, crippled, and shallow..._

_Don't leave me here again_

 

Mirabelle called out multiple times...and finally she saw him in the form she knew best: himself. She smiled with tears blurring her amethyst gaze, she ran towards him saying,

"Solas! I finally found you!"

"Vhenan..." Solas stated simply, sadness in his tone and expression.

"Solas...please...you must tell me where you've gone. Leliana's spies...they've searched for you...everywhere in Thedas...but turned up with nothing every time." she said, desperation in her tone.

"I cannot tell you where I am...it would only cause more questions...you must not know who I truly am either. It would only hurt you more than I already have managed to do..." he explained, hands behind his back and had the same sad tone and expression.

He was dressed...differently. He wore what looked like Elven Sentinel golden armor, with a large, brown, fur sash crossing his upper body from his left shoulder to his right hip. He had a very impressive looking mage's staff strapped to his back as well. Similar to the one he used as a walking staff when he walked at her side while on the way to Skyhold. He looked very regal.

"I don't care. I need to find you! You left me...without saying a word...and I didn't think it would hurt as much as it did that much is true...but I must find you, Solas. I still love you. Please...tell me where you are..." she said, sadness and desperation in her tone.

Solas just looked at her and said nothing...he was clearly upset, but then he disappeared into thin air. Mirabelle's eyes widened and she became frantic again and started to call out, once more,

"SOLAS?! Solas! Please! Come back! Tell me where you are...PLEASE!"

Tears that were threatening to escape, started to pour from her amethyst eyes.

 

_Fruit of life..._

_I can hear the voices of the hive_

_Chemicals collide_

_Loaded smile..._

_Light the way for those you left behind_

_Set the earth on fire_

_'Cause I don't want enough..._

_I want it all_

 

She again searched for him once more...she needed to find him and try to get him to tell her where he was. Her vision now blurred by the tears stinging her eyes. She tried to blink them away but they would just be replaced with more tears. She called for him and ran in every direction but it was like he had completely vanished and that she was just going in circles. Her voice broke every time she called out his name...she was starting to lose herself. Her mental state was weakening, her mind was being lost, her body was becoming weak the more she ran. She lost her footing and tripped, falling to the cold, damp, forest ground beneath her feet. She was on all fours, crying hysterically, she felt like all was lost. He was never going to tell her where he was...and she still didn't know why he just left without saying a word. She cried and managed to choke out the words,

"S-Solas...why must you do this to me?"

She was sobbing and she ended up falling completely to the ground and getting into a fetal position and just laying there crying...feeling all hope was truly lost. As she lay there...Solas reappeared in his wolf form. His ears laid flat...and the look in his four piercing, red eyes was nothing but anguish. She seemed to feel the presence of him once more and she stopped sobbing, gasped...and looked around frantically. She said,

"I can feel you again...but...I don't see you...is this what you'll continue doing to me? Tormenting me...? Hurting me further...? Turning my heart into dust?! All I did was love you...and accept you for who you were! Or I should say...who you pretended to be..."

Solas couldn't speak to her in his current form, but her words made him get closer to her, and just reformed back into his Elven form a few feet away from her, but walked closer to her...inches away from her. She shot her head around to look at him with a tear streaked face and she stumbled to her feet and basically threw herself at him and he caught her. She was caught off guard what happened next...he put his hand under her chin and kissed her passionately.

 

_Love left me hollow..._

_I'm with you in the end_

_Cold, crippled, and shallow..._

_Don't leave me here again_

_I can't go on..._

_You are bound to break me in_

_I come undone..._

_As you drag me down again_

 

He was reeling her in again...only to end up pushing her away from him gently, then vanishing once more. She started to sob again and said,

"No...no! NO! Solas...please! Come back to me! Don't leave me here in the dark again! PLEASE! Please..."

 

_I come undone!_

 

She was losing herself once more...this time...it was more like a mental breakdown. She heard Solas' voice...but didn't see him. He spoke and said, sadness in his tone,

"Vhenan...you must let go of me. You must not know where I am...I do not wish to tell you...because it would only cause more pain for you and more questions."

She was started to black out. She knew she would be waking up soon...but she didn't want to. She started to hold on longer. She wanted to at least speak with him more. But it was like she couldn't speak. No words were coming. She tried to speak but nothing passed her lips. He spoke once more,

"Leave me to bear my burden alone, Mira...I could not ask you to bear it with me. Please... _wake up_." he whispered those last two words.

 

Once those words were said...she gasped, and shot upright in her bed and called out into her darkened, cold room,

"Solas!"

She searched the room frantically, hoping for any sign of Solas anywhere. But there was nothing. He was nowhere. She slid her knees up to her chest, wrapping her arms around them and then leaning her head forward into her knees and crying into them. She was hysterical right now...she was left with no answers again. Now...all hope was truly lost to her at this moment in time. Her heart was had a hollow hole in it...that would never be filled. She didn't want to give up...but she was starting to see no point in searching for him if he didn't wish to be found. She felt so abandoned...and most definitely broken. She knew she would find him one day...but she didn't know when that day would finally be here. She just needed to continue her search for him...no matter what it took.

 

_Love left me hollow..._

_I'm with you in the end_

_Cold, crippled, and shallow..._

_Don't leave me here again_

_I can't go on..._

_You are bound to break me in_

_I come undone..._

_As you drag me down again_

 

She would find him. Whatever it takes...she WILL find him. And he will answer for why he left...and she couldn't wait for that day. She cried herself to sleep again that night...just like she did every night that she woke from a dream with Solas in the Fade...she felt helpless and alone. But she knew she would find him one day...she counted on it no matter what he told her.

 

 


End file.
